Updated: Feb 26
So let me be clear, I love kambo. I love sananga. I love hape. I work with all three on a regular basis, and I am so grateful for their wisdom and teachings. Yet sometimes I have fear, trepidation, and/or dread before ceremony. It is like something in my body knows it will be intense and that I will be visiting energy that is stuck pretty deep. I had this occur on day three. The warrior series is typically three days of kambo in a row. If this is not possible, it can be spread out over a lunar cycle, but it is very powerful to peel through the layers and dig deep in a short span of time. The lymphatic system is pushing and moving out so many physical toxins and the energetic body can go through a drastic re-structuring and organization.
Today I wanted to keep working on the heart, but add in some lung points. In the Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) piece we learned from the previous day, the lung part really resonated and stuck with me.
Lungs energetically represent grief and sadness. I smoked on and off when I was younger. It is not something I am proud of, but it was a coping mechanism I developed that was suffocating, masking, and stuffing down the grief and sadness I was storing in my body. I was not sure what to expect with these points. They were on the front of my shoulder and I knew it might unlock old emotional energy.
I am so fascinated with the body and how energy and emotions move through the organs. I have carried this grief and sadness in my chest and around my heart for a long time. I did not have a traditional childhood. With my sister Madeline’s leukemia at a young age and my own severe health problems starting in middle school, it was an uphill climb at times. My parents were the ever positive rocks and we
pushed through it all, taking it in stride! I was subconsciously carrying sadness; a sadness of suffering and of occasional chronic, debilitating pain in my spine and body. This wore on me mentally and emotionally. Even before kambo found me, I was already moving through many of these old layers and I was so much better in mind, body, and Spirit versus 10 years ago when I went through a pretty dark phase in my mid-20s.
I knew I still had some old ‘ish locked up in my chest, so I went for it...two lung points and two heart points.
Oh my goodness...purging can come in so many forms. It was weird, my body felt numb and I was only feeling energy; the waves and waves of energy flowing through my chest were so powerful. I felt the kambo unlocking a flood gate of stagnant memories that I had not touched on in many years. I had a small upward purge from this one but the main effect was that I needed to lay down. I could not hold my body up from the intense energy that was moving. I was wiped.
I had moved to a bed/futon inside the house to recover. All of our sessions were done outside, but if we needed to go inside to use the restroom or rest, we could. I have typically recovered quickly after ceremony. Most of the time I can take it like a champ. I may be swollen, but I can usually get to moving and staying energized. This time was very different. I have never in my life felt more overrun with old emotions and sadness. Old memories had begun to flow and I was doing a mini-life review. I couldn’t move. All I could do was lay there. I laid there for probably an hour and a half. People would come check on me every once in a while and physically I was fine, my body was fine, but my emotional body was rocked. I got up after a while and began moving around. I needed to sit by myself. I also needed a hug!
I finally moved over to the tea table where everyone was having tea. This was a fun part of the training that was unexpected as the hosts were tea aficionados. I sat in silence for a while, just absorbing the energy. When I finally spoke, the tears started to come; so many tears. I cried and talked through some of what I experienced and cried some more. Wow! It was so cathartic. It felt so good to literally get this off my chest! It is amazing what we lock up in our body, hidden away for the right time and space to heal.
I began to regain my faculties and felt like eating something. It was almost dinner time by this point so we all gathered and celebrated day three of our learning!
More night sweats. Keep it “moving out” and “allow” were the words that came to me. Be in peace. Be in stillness. All good things are coming.
*To learn more about kambo and if it may be a good fit for you, please visit this link or reach out to Carly 336-403-6181*